When you stress yourself up too much with something, like it or not, you come to a point where you need a break. It’s not that you stop from doing a specific thing from one day to another: Your mind simply blocks you, leaving you in a state of both protection and inability, where the only thing to do for you is wait.
That’s what is happening to me right now: If you follow my website, you’ve probably noticed I haven’t been updating it for almost three weeks now. Which is crazy, considering I always damn myself when I can’t write new content each day, but now it doesn’t seem to worry me that much: I just can’t do much about it. I wouldn’t call this laziness, more like a (needed?) break I didn’t plan.
After all, even though my website has been online for six months, I’ve been working on it for more than a year, from the day I came back from Japan full of the inspiration only that country can give to me: From late winter, spring, the stressful summer and my holidays spent working at my laptop to build what you see today, from the launch in Autumn and all the work I’ve done until now, there hasn’t been a single day in my life in the past 15 months I haven’t dedicated to my website, while also doing my main job of artisan. I’m glad of this, as it’s the sign and proof of how much I believe in it from a personal point of view, but this unavoidably led me to this “catatonic” state: I stare at this blank page on my laptop, but no word is coming out of my mind. I can write small updates, but that’s just it.
This saddens me a lot, but I know it’s just a temporary state, cause I can feel my huge passion for music and writing alive inside of me: It just needs to rest a bit. I’m not sure if I should call this a writer’s block (it sounds cocky to be honest: I’m no best-seller writer or professional journalist) but I think this might be tied to other matters going on in my life now.
For now, I spend my days doing my regular job, running, playing videogames and listening to rap music, which is a genre that always helped me a lot in this kind of moments. I will be back writing again soon, when my mind will start collaborating again with my passion.
Don’t worry, you will never get rid of me 🙂